In Iceland most people live in a block of flats or on a street where everyone knows each other’s cars. Your neighbour is the one who hears your children, takes in your parcel and perhaps clears the snow from the path with you. In Islam the neighbour is no afterthought. They are named in the same breath as parents and relatives.
In the same verse as parents
The Qur’an names two neighbours: the near and the farther away.
۞وَٱعۡبُدُواْ ٱللَّهَ وَلَا تُشۡرِكُواْ بِهِۦ شَيۡـٔٗاۖ وَبِٱلۡوَٰلِدَيۡنِ إِحۡسَٰنٗا وَبِذِي ٱلۡقُرۡبَىٰ وَٱلۡيَتَٰمَىٰ وَٱلۡمَسَٰكِينِ وَٱلۡجَارِ ذِي ٱلۡقُرۡبَىٰ وَٱلۡجَارِ ٱلۡجُنُبِ وَٱلصَّاحِبِ بِٱلۡجَنۢبِ وَٱبۡنِ ٱلسَّبِيلِ وَمَا مَلَكَتۡ أَيۡمَٰنُكُمۡۗ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ لَا يُحِبُّ مَن كَانَ مُخۡتَالٗا فَخُورًا
Worship Allah and associate nothing with Him, and to parents do good, and to relatives, orphans, the needy, the near neighbor, the neighbor farther away, the companion at your side, the traveler, and those whom your right hands possess. Indeed, Allah does not like those who are self-deluding and boastful
Scholars have understood the two neighbours in different ways: the one who lives closest and the one further off, or the one who is related to you and the one who is a stranger. Many of them note that the neighbour farther away may be of another faith. The right comes from living side by side, not from sharing a religion.
“I thought he would make him an heir”
مَا زَالَ يُوصِينِي جِبْرِيلُ بِالْجَارِ حَتَّى ظَنَنْتُ أَنَّهُ سَيُوَرِّثُهُ
“Jibril kept urging me to treat the neighbour well, until I thought he would make him an heir.”
Inheritance passes only between close relatives. The Prophet ﷺ says Jibril came back to the neighbour so often that he thought the neighbour would be made family.
Safe from you
A measure of faith: can your neighbour rest easy?
وَاللَّهِ لاَ يُؤْمِنُ، وَاللَّهِ لاَ يُؤْمِنُ، وَاللَّهِ لاَ يُؤْمِنُ. قِيلَ وَمَنْ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ قَالَ الَّذِي لاَ يَأْمَنُ جَارُهُ بَوَايِقَهُ
“By God, he does not believe! By God, he does not believe! By God, he does not believe! It was asked: Who, Messenger of God? He said: The one whose neighbour is not safe from his harm.”
He swore three times. In another hadith he ties the neighbour directly to faith in God and the Last Day:
مَنْ كَانَ يُؤْمِنُ بِاللَّهِ وَالْيَوْمِ الآخِرِ فَلْيَقُلْ خَيْرًا أَوْ لِيَصْمُتْ وَمَنْ كَانَ يُؤْمِنُ بِاللَّهِ وَالْيَوْمِ الآخِرِ فَلْيُكْرِمْ جَارَهُ وَمَنْ كَانَ يُؤْمِنُ بِاللَّهِ وَالْيَوْمِ الآخِرِ فَلْيُكْرِمْ ضَيْفَهُ
“Whoever believes in God and the Last Day, let him speak good or stay silent. Whoever believes in God and the Last Day, let him honour his neighbour. Whoever believes in God and the Last Day, let him honour his guest.”
In a block of flats this means things everyone knows: noise late at night, the bins, the parking, the shared stairwell. A neighbour being safe from you also means they have nothing to dread from what you do.
More water in the broth
It need not be much: just more than you need yourself.
يَا أَبَا ذَرٍّ إِذَا طَبَخْتَ مَرَقَةً فَأَكْثِرْ مَاءَهَا وَتَعَاهَدْ جِيرَانَكَ
“Abū Dharr, when you cook broth, add more water to it and look after your neighbours.”
And he told the women that none of them should think little of a gift to her neighbour, “even if it is a sheep’s hoof”:
يَا نِسَاءَ الْمُسْلِمَاتِ لاَ تَحْقِرَنَّ جَارَةٌ لِجَارَتِهَا وَلَوْ فِرْسِنَ شَاةٍ
“O Muslim women! Let no neighbour look down on what she gives her neighbour, even if it is only a sheep’s hoof.”
Many Muslim families in Iceland do exactly this in Ramadan and at Eid: a plate of dates or pastries goes up or down the stairwell. It is not a custom people brought from other countries; it is Sunnah.
Who first?
ʿĀʾisha once asked: I have two neighbours; to which of them should I give? The answer was simple:
إِلَى أَقْرَبِهِمَا مِنْكِ بَابًا
“To the one whose door is nearer to you.”
The nearest door. In Iceland that may be the door across the landing. If your neighbour would like to know more about Ramadan or Eid, the guide for friends and neighbours is written for them.